Ride the ghost horse all the way to the end
Make some magic mushroom music!
Kill the Phantom guarding the ancient mines
Pass your abandoned minecart driving test
Complete all the underground bomb-bouncing courses
Kill the tyrannical Scarecrow and liberate the crows
Smash all the crates in the fields
Send a monster back to the grave
Equip the Legendary Holy Glory Shovel
Pick up a crow skull
Beat the gate guards to the gate they guard on guard carts
Go for a nice walk with Abelard the Gargoyle
Reach the end of the vortex like a paper boat down a drain
Collect all crow skulls in the fields
Find all crow skulls in the ancient mines
Collect all crow skulls in the swamp
Collect all crow skulls in Skeletown
Collect all crow skulls in the graveyard
Collect all crow skulls in the North
Ruin the Witch and Merchant's cruelty-free dinner
Be the David to Dhor's Goliath (i.e. kill the big guy)
Solve world hunger (by killing Gluttony)
Find a gramophone and DANCE, DANCE, DANCE!
Finish the tutorial
Win the game of Conveniently-Placed Hydraulic-Operated Underground Whack-a-Mole (patent pending)
Clear away all those headstones cluttering up the graveyard
Get on Santa's Super-Duper-Duper-Naughty List
Give in to your inner completionist
Make vinyls cool again. ...Actually, that's impossible, even as a joke. Just find all the gramophones.
Fill out your wardrobe
Collect every single crow skull in the world
Buy a new outfit!
